Mark's been having a bit of back pain the past month or so. Can't get comfortable in any position. But it came and went, and was gone more than it was there, so he tried to bear it. Nagging wife said "You know, this really bothers you. You should go see your doctor." Well, he didn't and he stopped complaining, so I thought "Must've gone away."
Yesterday, I got the phone call "Hi. I've got blood in my urine. I'm getting a bite to eat and then heading for a CT scan." He got to blood in my urine and my head screamed CANCER CANCER CANCER. He continued on..."They think it's a kidney stone." My head continued to scream CANCER CANCER CANCER. Then I started arguing with myself. He's young, of course they think it's a kidney stone. CANCER CANCER CANCER. It's just a kidney stone - stop being ridiculous. CANCER CANCER CANCER. This went on until they called to say it was a kidney stone. At which point, Mark fessed up that his head was whispering CANCER CANCER CANCER at him too.
Cancer did that to us. It took away our ability for reason because it seems to defy reason. It took away our willingness to go with a likely scenario because it's so random and unexpected. It still paralyzes our hearts with fear. It wasn't cancer this time, but I'm unable to stop wondering "When and where will the beast strike next?" Cancer truly sucks.
